Joke
A guy asked a girl in a library, "Do you mind if I sit beside you?" The girl answered with a loud voice, "I DON'T WANT TO SPEND THE NIGHT WITH YOU!!!"
All the students in the library started staring at the guy, and he was embarrassed. After a couple of minutes, the girl walked quietly to the guy's table and she told him, "I study psychology, and I know what a man is thinking. I guess you felt embarrassed, right?"
The guy responded with a loud voice, "$200 JUST FOR ONE NIGHT!? THAT'S TOO MUCH!!!"
And all the people in the library looked at the girl in shock, and the guy
whispered in her ear, "I study law, and I know how to make someone feel guilty.
Author unkown
Word Of The Wise
Nobody is perfect... You have to believe in yourself. Let nobody put you down or put you out. Everybody has a point of view and so do you. Let nobody make you believe they have a better view than you. There's a reason why you are where you stand, there are somethings you can see they simply can't... Learn from people but don't let them change you. Nobody knows how you feel better than you do. What you feel is what your spirit and body is telling you, what they see is purely their assumptions from what they can see. The combination of what they see and what you feel explains better where you stand in the loop. We all need one another to complete each other and not to change who we are. If they didn't create you then they can't understand why you're you. It is your duty to find yourself and be the best you can. You are made for great works so let no one limit you, you have to be really strong in this world full of distractions. Be thankful to God for being you and be confident in you. Do have a great rest of the week appreciating and being the best of you.
By @Atemiyato Akanni Temiyato
Night Boat Ride & Dance
cheers.
Jessie J - Bang Bang ft. Ariana Grande & Nicki Minaj
Create Your Thoughts
Saturday, August 23rd .
By Pastor Chris
Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life (Proverbs 4:23).
Some define thoughts as imaginations, but thoughts are more than imaginations. Imaginations are pictures or images of the mind that interpret your thoughts. Thoughts are powerful; they can deliver to you a glorious life, or keep you on the sideline of life. The Bible says as a man thinks in his heart, so is he (Proverbs 23:7). You’re the character of your thoughts.
If you’d let the Word dominate your thinking, it’ll give you the right mindset of victory, success, and dominion, with visions of limitless possibilities. Romans 12:2 says, “And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind….” When your thoughts are consistent with the provisions of God’s Word, your life will be a reflection of His glory, for the glory is in the Word.
Consider Joshua; the Lord said to him, “…See, I have given into thine hand Jericho, and the king thereof, and the mighty men of valour” (Joshua 6:1-2). How was he supposed to see the victory ahead of the battle? It was with the power of His mind, his thoughts and imaginations. If Joshua hadn’t seen the victory in his mind, Israel would never have possessed Jericho.
What does that tell you? It means, the extent of your vision is the boundary of your blessing. How far you can see with your mind, through the power of thoughts, is how much you will possess.
What do you see? What are your thoughts? Discipline your mind; choose the thoughts you accept. This marks a difference between the one who is disciplined, and turns out to be a success, and the one who isn’t: their thinking. Direct your mind to think the right thoughts. You’re the one to choose the way your thoughts must go; you're the one to create your thoughts: “…whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report…think on these things” (Philippians 4:8).
CONFESSION
My mind is anointed to think the “God-kind” of thoughts. As I meditate on your Word, I build a wealth of thoughts that keep me in the arena of glory, health, and prosperity, causing me to live the best life here on earth, in Jesus’ Name. Amen.
Further Study: 1 Corinthians 2:16 For who hath known the mind of the Lord, that he may instruct him? But we have the mind of Christ. ;
Philippians 4:8 Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.
Daily Scripture Reading
1 Year Bible Reading Plan: 1 Corinthians 8,
Psalms 120-127
2 Year Bible Reading Plan: Colossians 2:1-7,
Jeremiah 8
EXTRACT FROM: Rhapsody of Realities
Bongo5's Exclusive interview with Q-Chief
Word of the Day
JOKE
A woman is walking on the road and a voice shouts out, "Don't take a step further." She obeys and suddenly a ton of bricks fall on the place where she would have otherwise been. She thinks she imagined it and keeps walking until suddenly the voice calls out again. "Don't take a step further." She stops and a car skids past. Then suddenly she hears the voice saying "I am your guardian angel, and I will warn you before something bad happens to you. Now do you have any questions to ask me?" Yes! Shouts the woman, "Just where were you on my wedding day!"
Breaking Bad
Am superly hooked on this series. Sadly am done with season 5. Sad how they all had to watch their backs so often if not all the time. To make things worse, you never know where you've left evidence that can come back to bite you in the derierre.
Joke! Style mpya ya kutongoza..ladies be warned
Binti: Hapana. Sina mpenzi.
Jamaa: Kitabu cha Mwanzo 2: 18 "Bwana Mungu akasema, Si vema huyo mtu awe peke yake, nitamfanyia msaidizi wa kufanana naye."
Jamaa: Waraka wa kwanza wa Yohana 4:8 "Yeye asiyependa, hakumjua Mungu, kwa maana Mungu ni upendo."
Jamaa: Injili ya Mathayo 12:34b "Maana, kinywa cha mtu huyanena yaujazayo moyo wake."
Jamaa: Injili ya Marko 13:31 "Mbingu na nchi zitapita; lakini maneno yangu hayatapita kamwe."
Jamaa: Mithali 31:29 "Binti za watu wengi wamefanya mema, Lakini wewe umewapita wote."
Jamaa: Wimbo Ulio Bora 4:7 "Mpenzi wangu, u mzuri pia pia, Wala ndani yako hamna ila."
Jamaa: Mithali 31:30 "Upendeleo hudanganya, na uzuri ni ubatili; Bali mwanamke amchaye Bwana, ndiye atakayesifiwa."
Jamaa: Mwanzo 2:24 " Kwa hiyo mwanamume atamwacha baba yake na mama yake naye ataambatana na mkewe, nao watakuwa mwili mmoja."
Jamaa: Yoshua 1:8 "Kitabu hiki cha torati kisiondoke kinywani mwako, bali yatafakari maneno yake mchana na usiku, upate kuangalia kutenda sawasawa na maneno yote yaliyoandikwa humo; maana ndipo utakapoifanikisha njia yako, kisha ndipo utakapositawi sana."
Jamaa: Zaburi 34:8 "Onjeni mwone ya kuwa Bwana yu mwema; Heri mtu yule anayemtumaini."
Jamaa: Wafilipi 4:8 "Hatimaye, ndugu zangu, mambo yo yote yaliyo ya kweli, yo yote yaliyo ya staha, yo yote yaliyo ya haki, yo yote yaliyo safi, yo yote yenye kupendeza, yo yote yenye sifa njema; ukiwapo wema wo wote, ikiwapo sifa nzuri yo yote, yatafakarini hayo."
Jamaa: Ufunuo wa Yohana 22:21b "Amina"
The Joys of being in Florida
Coming across garden snakes is one of the things i have to get used to. I never thought i could walk past a snake twice without running away screaming, but i did so today. God is good. Am not scared of these snakes no more, so long as they leave me alone and don't get in my way, i wont get in their way either.
Lawyer Joke
Just then, Jenny appeared and announced to the man she charged $5,000 a visit.
Without hesitation, the man pulled out five thousand dollars and gave it to Jenny, and they went upstairs.
After an hour, the man calmly left.
Jenny explained that no one had ever come back two nights in a row as she was too expensive.
But there were no discounts. The price was still $5,000. Again, the man pulled out the money, gave it to Jenny, and they went upstairs.
Everyone was astounded that he had come for a third consecutive night, but he paid Jenny and they went upstairs.
After their session, Jenny said to the man, 'No one has ever been with me three nights in a row.
Where are you from?'.
She asked me to personally give you your $15,000 inheritance. '
Rahman Nursery school & Madrasat Rahman Segerea ,Dar-es-salaam inahitaji msaada wako kuchangia msingi wenye mahadili mazuri kwa watoto
MEREMETA NA HASSANALI (MH15)
JOKE
A woman in her eighties made the evening news because she was getting married for the fourth time. The following day she was being interviewed by a local TV station, and the commentator asked about what it felt to be married again at that age and would she share part of her previous experiences, since it seem quite unique the fact that her new husband was a ‘funeral director.’ After a short time to think, a smile came to her face and she proudly explained that she had first married a banker when she was in her twenties, in her forties she married a circus ring master, and in her sixties she married a pastor and now in her eighties, a funeral director. The amazed commentator asked her why she had married men with such diverse carriers. With a smile on her face she explained, ‘I married one for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, and four to go.’
Wimbo alioimbiwa Beyonce na msichana aliyemtosa Jay Z
Olivia McFaller, a former model, who claims Jay Z tried to cheat on his wife Beyonce with her, has released a song aimed at the superstar couple. The rapper addresses Beyonce in the new track in which she claims she turned down Jay Z’s advances.
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